On "On Confusing Bravery with Stupidity" (thank you thought catalog!)

Thought Catalog-On Confusing Bravery with Stupidity

Oh thank you thank you thank you Carolyn Huynh for writing this beautiful piece of hope. And thank you Kerry for posting another link from this page that I ended up being led to laugh and then read this, too.

My Room!

After a few 4 hour nights, and 3 hour naps during the day, I began to wonder the same thing—am I confusing bravery with stupidity? I find myself on another island-ish city, Bombay, India, fighting my own tears of loneliness and exhaustion, so tired but unable to sleep, plagued my thoughts’ frustrating ability to be the most annoying and upsetting when I am most defenseless to turn them off. Struggling to discover whether the internet is my friend or foe—a necessary evil I need to communicate with contacts made and contacts yet to be made but yet such a tantalizing and tempting window of access to the companions in my life I love so dearly and yet I have built a wall of time and space between us this year. Am I silly? Am I courageous? I hope balance is more stable than running back and forth between extremes, so that you just seem to spend more time in the middle than at the ends.

I feel as though I have been here for days—the odd naps that must happen when bouts of absolute fatigue wash over me certainly divide the day. But I have also seen and learned much from the people around me.

Bombay/Mumbai is a rather cosmopolitan place that seems to sleep less than New York. People from all over the country and world come to work and they work a lot. I am staying with the utterly amazing family of a friend from Hamilton, Ipsita Bhatia, in their 9^th story flat in Old Bombay. I can see the dome of the Taj Hotel from one window, a fish market from another and the Arabian Sea from both. There are ships from the Naval base and the smaller fishing vessels mingling in the harbour (whose crashing sounds so pleasant, I hope it will rock me to sleep). Squawking crows and egrets have greeted me both mornings far before sunrise. What an incredible city. 

I took a walk yesterday to try and get my phone to make outgoing calls and purchase some Indian clothes. FabIndia, a fixed rate clothing shop, is about 2 km one way from the Bhatia’s flat on the Colaba Causeway. Museums, coffee shops, street vendors, a movie theater, people, people, people—so much to see! I was so overwhelmed by the time I got there that I was too tired to choose anything (shopping is a process for me) so I walked back. But I got my phone fixed (!!), so today is about getting in touch with my contacts and starting a new routine! and hopefully kicking some jet lag butt :o)